I Got Huffington Posted

My fourth Huffington Post story, “Why Women Rule the World,” published Tuesday evening on the website’s Women blog (as opposed to its Healthy Living/Generation Why blog where my previous three stories published). I’m excited to expand my writing topics to reach new readers.

Until Arianna Huffington gets sick of me, I’ll continue as a contributing blogger. Since I may not update this blog each time a new Huff Post story publishes, you can receive notifications other ways, including Twitter and Facebook. You can also subscribe to my Huffington Post feed here. You can view my Huffington Post profile, which displays all my stories, here. If you already have a HuffPost Social News account (or want one), you can become my fan here. And because it is fun asking you to click so many times, here is a teaser of “Why Women Rule the World” with a link to read the full story.

Why Women Rule the World

Though I had a girlfriend for one month in the seventh grade, in general, I have endured female rejection until I recently hit my stride. This background makes me the most unlikely expert on women since Mickey Rooney, and the most unlikely representation of males aside from David Duchovny. However, I believe I have suffered in order to learn the secrets of the fairer sex. Women: here is why you rule the world, according to me.

You think you know what you want, but your feelings about men fluctuate like Ben Affleck's Boston accent. I communicate and behave based on my best guess: consolation when you're feeling down, dry humor when you're testing my wit, exclamation points and "haha's" when you're excited, short and sporadic messages when you find me overbearing and immediate replies when you're comfortable. Guessing makes me restless and anxious. You are terrible for my health.

Keep reading, here.